ranting-

ok fine i'm useless, i hope you're happy with that.

i didn't take my damn german o'levels because i'm hum, i know i won't pass. i didn't bloody take grade 7 practical because im hum, i know i won't pass. i can't bloody pass my damn mathematics despite studying almost only mathematics, i suck. happy?

you think i bloody can't complete anything i do, you think its damn encouraging to come home with some shit result on my test paper isit? you think it feels great to fail or something? i tell you it doesn't feel great, not at all. i feel like a bloody useless bum whenever i fail.

i don't waste time by the com. at least my friends are there for me when i need them.
i don't wate time bowling and playing flight sim. why can't i have my own damn passion and aspiration. this sounds bloody cliched but at least they provide me with avenues to vent my anger and disappointment. i don't do things for nothing.

perhaps i shouldn't even try to reach out of my limits, where i am now. would your expectations have been lower if i were somewhere else. would it be lower if i didn't even try to outperform my born limits in the first place.


look people, i'm sorry for all these ranting, i just really needed to get them off my chest and this seemed the only avenue for me to rant without bothering anyone.