of closed doors and reality-

secured early from camp today so i went back to school to collect the school graduating certificate in the evening. it came in a very nice brown folder with the words on the cover embossed in gold.

on the way home i read through everything with mixed feelings. reading the testimonial made me appreciate again (since i've already read the testimonial before.) how nice miss bobillier is, making a playful kid like me sound like some conscientious student. obviously i didn't deserve that.

opened the letter box to find NTU's letter-

"We regret to inform you that due to keen competition your appeal (for change of programme to Aerospace Engineering) has not been successful... The place in the Mechanical Engineering programme has been reserved for you for academic year 2011/12."

receiving such notifications are, of course, disappointing. but who else can i blame but myself for not having performed better? whatever happened during a'levels period cannot, and will not be an excuse for such mediocre results. but what's over is over, i will stop lamenting and start thinking about and planning for the future.

when everything you planned doesn't work out at all, could it be Him telling you where he actually wants you to go? perhaps submission is just something my rebellious nature needs to learn-